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WOOOW. What to do, I think it took us maybe a day to ask the older girls and ourselves if we wanted our family to grow to 5 kids for ever. GOD 5, girls! This would mean no trying for the boy we thought about. Would we do it? Could we do it? Mandy had been with her mother for 14 months, through a lot in that time. Sandy was only 6 weeks old, she was not given time to experience very much pain. YES WE WOULD!! It was set up that at the meeting that was set for the next couple days, we would bring 2 more car seats for the girls. When we leave we will become a family of 5 girls. Ages 12,10,2 and 1/2, 14months and 6 weeks. LORD WE ARE GOING TO NEED YOUR HELP EVEN MORE THAN BEFORE. The day of the meeting was very stressful, my anxiety was running high. We sat in a room away from sight of mom; they took Fawn into the room with her. This was going to evaluate just how much Fawn was bonded to her mother. Fawn wanted nothing to do with her, she just kept crying for mommy and daddy {us}. Her mother made the remark that she never wants to be with her, but at least Mandy did. After about a half hour the worker came out with Fawn, Mandy and Sandy, I took the baby Mike took hold of Fawn and another worker held Mandy. Into the elevator we scurried, my heart was beating so fast I could hardly breath. As we got to the car I looked back at the doors thinking, “ this is it there is no turning back”. We loaded all three girls into the car, Fawn just sat looking puzzled. When we finely got home after the longest ride from that office I’d ever ridden, we brought the girls into the house. Mandy was just starting to walk; she had blond hair and green eyes. Eyes that seemed to be empty of emotion, she just sat looking around taking in all of her new environment. Sandy was this little fat face very little, black hair and black eyes ball of joy. Mike had to run out to buy 2 new cribs we had gotten rid of all the ones we had, thinking that we were through with taking in babies. I carefully took off the girl’s clothes they came in and gave them baths. Fawn was having a great time playing with Mandy; she kept kissing and hugging her. Fawn seemed to be a little confused not knowing why the two sisters were now in her house. The big girls took to Sandy right away taking over with her care. Mandy was more standoffish with them. I noticed that she didn’t know how to do many simple things to interact with people. She didn’t know to lift up her arms to be picked up, walking from sidewalk to grass puzzled her, chewing even a banana gave her trouble. She seemed to just stare off into space a lot. In the mornings the 3 little girls would be eating breakfast, when one of Dawns friends would come in on her way to school. She would take time to talk to the girls while waiting for the others. After seeing that Mandy needed more one on one with me I dove into the challenge. She went everywhere with me never leaving my side for very long. I did notice something a couple strange things with Mandy, when daddy would change her diaper she would just lay still, when at bedtime she would stand in her bed screaming. I would go in to lay her back down and cover her up, she would throw herself back to her pillow and squeeze her eyes clinching her fists. What was this?