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Amy said that Michael looked like the little cookies called "teddy grams", so she nicknamed him that. Mark and Michael played pretty well together. Mandy seemed to get worse, the visits with mom continued. By the third day Michael was calling me mama, and using the furniture and walls to walk. He would get upset when the others went into rooms he couldn't get into fast enough. So I bought him a walker, this to him was cool. He ran after all the kids. He didn't want much to do with our dad though. Poor dad always pushed away. Michaels first visit with mom was scheduled. I decided that he needed me to take him. What a nightmare. I got to the office where the visit was going to take place. Mom came in with her sister and her mother. When I saw Michael’s mom, Lisa, I saw a very young girl. Her makeup was perfect; her nails were long and painted. Her hair was curly and perfect too. She was very thin, which made her look taller than she really was. She stepped to the back of the visiting room behind her mother who sat in the only chair. I sat on the floor with Michael on my lap. The twins played with the toys in the room and talked with mom. Grandma was giving all her attention to Fabian. Michael just sat on my lap hanging on for dear life and watched the others. Mom had brought some toys for the kids and was passing them out. Michael screamed when she reached toward him. I thought he would do better if I left the room, so I sat him on the floor in front of me. I gradually snuck away from him and moved out of the room. I didn't get too far before he started screaming” mama" and crawled out of the room towards me. I took him back into the room and explained he was having a rough time. Grandma made a nasty remark that stuck to my ears; she said something about Michael being spoiled and fat. This didn't set to well with me, but who was I to judge her. She then started talking to me like she thought I was the driver who had brought him to the visit. Lisa, Michaels mom told her mom,” Mom I think she is Michaels foster mom.” Then she looked at me and said, "Aren’t you?" I told her yes I was. The worker tried to explain Michael’s actions to mom and grandma. He had been through a hard time and had felt safe with me; this was a natural thing for him. Mom seemed to try to understand. Time was finely up, the visit was over, time to leave. Mom walked around and kissed everyone good-bye and walked out. She didn't kiss Michael. She never said a word to him. I thought "that's o.k. Michael I'll be your mommy."
Michael continued to settle into our family. Him and I got even closer. After about a month Michael started walking. He was talking more, and even getting closer to daddy. He was allowing dad to get close to him, even sitting next to him. This was a big move for Michael.
About this time I was starting to think,” God, what have I gotten myself into?” I had five children living in a three-bedroom townhouse. I was tying to make life glide smoothly for us all. We moved the kid’s bedrooms around several times, trying to figure out the right combination that worked for everyone to get along.